R E S P E C T

Remind me NOT to tell my co-workers that I have a blog – because I’m about to talk about another one of them.  While working over the weekend, a co-worker got all bent out of shape because someone called her “Ma’am.”  She said to me, “I’m not an old hag!”

I’ve also heard Oprah speak about this on her show – how it makes her feel old to be called Ma’am.  I just have to say – lighten up folks.  Sir and Ma’am are both words people use as a sign of RESPECT.  Do we not want to be respected?  Maybe some don’t feel deserving of respect?  Maybe it’s a reaction to getting old (which we all are dontcha know).

It just irks me that this irks other people.  There’s no ill intent on behalf of the person calling you Ma’am.  I am absolutely thrilled to be called Ma’am – especially by small children.  It’s the sweet sound of respect!

A similar convo could be had about calling people, “Mrs. So-and-So”” or “Mr. So-and-So.”  Some people hate it because that’s what their friends called their parents.  Well – the time has now come – that you are the adult in your child’s friend’s life.  You are the parent.  You get to be called, “Mrs.” or “Mr.”

Kay?

thank God for the darkness

…because, really, I was busting a gut this evening while driving home from my husband’s grandmother’s house, and if the girls saw they might not have understood. Back story…

My husband’s grandfather died yesterday. It was not a surprise — he had been quite ill for some time. Since this will be the girls’ first experience with a wake/funeral/burial, we’ve been careful to try to explain everything that is going to go on.

First, we were asking our six-year-old if she wanted to go to school on Wednesday, or attend the funeral Mass with us.

Me: First there will be a special Mass for Grandpa, then we’ll go to the cemetery where they’ll bury him…
4yo: BURY HIM?!!?
Me: yes, when you die, after your soul has gone to heaven, they bury your body in the ground.
4yo: so all that’s left is his HEAD? There will just be a HEAD???
DH: (quietly busting a gut)
Me: um, no, I’m sorry sweetie, that’s a little confusing, isn’t it? No, his body will still be attached to his head…they’ll bury all of him.

Then, we explain what a casket is, how Daddy will help carry it into the church. They ask if they will get to see him. So we explain that how, if they want to, they can see him at the wake, because there’s a special door on top of the casket that opens up.

DH: It will look like he’s sleeping….and he’ll be wearing a suit –
4yo:he’s going to be NAKED??
Me: (quietly busting a gut)
DH: No, sweetie, he’s not going to be wearing his birthday suit…

Later on, our 4yo asks, “what was wrong with him, anyways?”

DH: Well, he was old, and very tired.
Me: And remember, he fell and hit his head, then he got very sick.
4yo: WAS HE RIDING ON HIS ROLLER SKATES WITHOUT A HELMET??!!?

We can’t wait to see what she comes up with at the actual wake and funeral… 😉

to go or not to go?

My 20-year high school reunion is in two weeks.

I’m strangely conflicted about attending…not that I look awful or I’m at all unhappy with where I am in my life. It’s hard to put my finger on it. Beyond the friends I still keep in touch with, there are about six people I’d like to see. I felt the same way going n to the 10-year reunion, and came out with a big “who cares” feeling. Like I didn’t really care about these people, and they didn’t care about me either. The booklet that said where everyone was and what they were doing was really interesting, but not exactly worth the $60 or whatever it was.

But I feel like if I don’t go, I’ll regret it or something.

Hm.

Growing Pains

I was recently told that Julie was “Kicking my But” at this blog thing – with many postings.  Must admit it is true.  So. . . here’s my back to school post.

If you home school – bare with me as I explain my reality.

My baby has started First Grade.  She is a total angel in my life – an incredible gift.  I have NEVER had a day with her that I thought – I wish someone would give me a BREAK from this child.  She is so easy-going, content, kind, and thoughtful.  Now – she’s with someone else for 7 of her waking hours.  It makes me sad.

I went to Target the first day of school.  BIG MISTAKE.  There were all kinds of moms with 3 and 4 year olds and all I could think was, “I don’t want my days to myself.”  Now, there were times that I wished for time to myself – just because being a mom of two kids can be exhausting – but I just wanted slices of time to myself – not DAYS and DAYS.

The homeschooling mom might say to me at this point, “Well, you know you could always home school.”  It’s true – I could.  If my daughter didn’t LOVE school -I would definitely consider it.  My son is pretty brainy – and a lot like me – so THAT wouldn’t work.  But I could home school my daughter if I thought it’d be better for her.  Right now, I think it’s best that she’s at a fabulous school – I’m just jealous that they get her all day.

It’s true – sometimes you really don’t know how good you have it – until it’s over.  I’ll treasure our half days and full days together – like never before.  If you are in the throws of parenting toddlers – I send you lots of grins.  I know toddler days are the hardest days – but someday soon, you’ll be in my shoes – shedding a tear that they’re over.

psa

My birthday is in 36 days

so I wonder

How do moms of many children deal with the food thing? You know, how kids eat constantly? Do they just put out food at mealtimes and the kids learn that this is the time you eat, or else you go hungry? Or do their kids graze at their leisure in the kitchen?

‘Cause my kids exhaust me, and there are only two of them. They ask for food every minute of the day. At least it feels like that. If we are leaving the house for more than 5 minutes, I have to pack 4586745907 snacks to avoid the inevitable chorus of “I’m huuuuunnnggggrrrrry” as soon as I put the car in drive. Which makes me want to poke my eyes out.

I’ve tried getting them to eat more at mealtimes, but it hasn’t seemed to make a difference. And only offering fruits or veggies for snacks — that works for about five minutes. (i.e. healthy snack is offered, child is suddenly not hungry any more, until five minutes later.) I do remind them regularly that they will not perish if they are forced to go longer than fifteen minutes without eating, but they’re not convinced.

eesh.

6 of 13

That’s not too shabby, right? There are still 7 things hanging over my head, and I’m on my way to acquiring a few new ones, but I’m not nearly as overwhelmed as I was last Thursday.

Being sick helps. I’ve had this awful, undefinable illness for much of the week which makes me cranky and more apt to either a) say NO to people; or b) tell it like it is. Like, when asked to get involved in a project, I unapologetically said, “get in line.” To someone who had given me a project to work on “whenever,” and asked how it was coming along, I finally said, “you’re going to need to give me a deadline or I will never, ever finish it.” Stuff like that.

so grateful

So, I sat down today to pay bills and tuition and whatnot and wrote out a series of checks totaling about four thousand dollars. And you would think that it would all make me cranky, but I’m just overcome with gratitude. My DH doesn’t get it — he’s never lived paycheck to paycheck, never been in debt, never had that sick feeling in his stomach, knowing that there were bills to pay and not enough money to pay them. But I have.

Something so seemingly small like sitting down to pay the bills makes me cry sometimes. Because while we don’t have a crazy amount of money, we have enough, and I’m so grateful.

Big Duh!

So, has anyone else seen the new Hyundai ad campaign? I’m assuming their running this drivel nationwide. It’s The Big Duh Savings Event. They’ve taken classical songs and sang them with a one word lyric – duh. If you like the songs (click on that blue link) you can even get a free CD of them when you buy a vehicle! BONUS! You can even make your own duh song.
It is so unbelievably insulting – that I can hardly stand it. If I owned a Hyundai, I would hide all traces of association with them. And, well there’s absolutely no chance I’d buy one now.

I’m always imagining sales pitch meetings – and how some of this stuff goes public. It says A LOT about them – and whoever their target audience is. Sorry Hyundai owners – you’ve been seriously wronged.

right here

Carrie asked where we are…well, I offer my Thursday Thirteen in response!

Thirteen Things That Are Hanging Over My Head

1. a web site redo — I have been working 4-5 hours a day on this project, in adddition to working my regular job and taking care of my kids. It’s eating me alive. And I’m not getting paid for it. (cue the violins…)
2. several mass e-mails to the staff at work asking them for things and telling them things — these are pretty important, too, I just can’t seem to sit down and get it all done
3. my house — notice I didn’t say “taking care of my house” in the first one. it constantly looks like a tornado has blown through, due to all of these freaking projects
4. a brochure — I’m revamping one for a friend who runs a snow-plowing biz, so it looks like if I can get this done I won’t have to shovel this winter. I heart bartering…
5. preschool paperwork — do I ever have a pile a mile high of forms to fill out and checks to write. by tomorrow. gah
6. school supply shopping — because I’m such a bargain geek I just can’t go to one store one time and be done with it
7. uniform shopping — and I forgot to place an order for the gift cards I need to do this…have to stop by the school office and see if they have any on hand. Not the end of the world if they don’t, but we earn credit for the gift cards we buy, and every little bit helps
8. rebuilding my MIL’s laptop — ’nuff said
9. figuring out why our computer won’t burn CDs any more — DH has been patient, but it’s one of those naggy things I need to fix
10. quitting a freelance gig — I have to bill this client and tell them that I’m not going to be able to oversee their sites anymore…not looking forward to this, but I have too many balls in too many courts and it’s making me nuts
11. cooking — just bought a bunch of fresh veggies at the farmer’s market and I have to use them before they go bad
12. organizing — friends just loaned me their Bosch and their grain mill for the year, which I am thrilled about, but I have to rework my kitchen to find a place for them. They are currently in a ginormous cardboard box on the dining room floor
13. planting pumpkins — DH ran over ours with the lawn mower and I’m told I might have time to plant new ones if they’re the bitty ones

All I really *want* to do is sit, knit, and watch Big Brother. 😉